Tuesday, March 30, 2010

6 Week Periods

My mom is my mother, best friend and therapist, all rolled up into, hands down, the most amazing woman in the world.  Her wisdom deep, her knowledge vast and her words always a comfort during times of unknown, unrest or unease. 

I wish I took more advantage of having a 24-hour on-call therapist and doting mom in my life.  During my younger years, I rolled my eyes when she wanted to "talk about feelings" and have family meetings and pre-kids, well, my life was pretty easy and my woes few and far between.  Having children has made me appreciate my mom, first for truly understanding how much she loves me and the sacrafices she made for me to have an amazing life and secondly because she helps me understand the challeneges (and joys) of raising children with self love and clarity.

Tonight she helped me see the light by gently pointing out that I dealt with a momentus toddler meltdown in the exact way that I yell at my husband for doing all the time.  Only a mom can get away with that one!  But, as always, she was right and left me feeling okay about my parental blunder...with a new way to think about things so that I can do "better" tomorrow. 

Since pretty much the day my son was born, my mom has helped me get through challenging times with the kids by reminding me, "it's just a tough 6-week period."  (Well, or teething...sorry mom, that one was for you!).  This observation -- that a kid's development happens in 6-week periods -- has helped me get through phases of non-sleep, non-listening, non-eating or non-giving their ol' mom a break stages! 

Well, we are in the throws of a tough period with MDB, as he nears his third birthday.  He is stomping his feet (and using them for a kick or two) to declare his independence and has a zero-to-sixty and back again range of emotions that not even the soap opera stars can replicate.  I swore I would NEVER be the mother that said, "use your words" to their child...but I can't think of a better thing to say when he just can't express what he is feeling in any other way but with his body or through tears!

Terrible twos, threes?  Thinking back, I remember the same thing happening as he neared his second birthday too...alhough, I might have blocked it out with a 5 week old baby at the time!

So, thanks Mom, for you.  I will finish my well-deserved glass of wine tonight with a toast to you, for knowing I only have 5 weeks, 2 days and 3 hours to go until a new stage begins!

1 comment:

  1. The threes were our worst. And I also noticed that at birthdays and half-birthdays, they went through big developmental leaps - not sure why the timing was so exact, but it was. Try to have a sense of humor about it. He's doing what he's supposed to do: trying to claim independence. I learned to pick my battles quickly, as otherwise it was a constant battle for control. I can always spot a 3 year old a mile away, as they're the ones wearing rain boots with tutus and Halloween costumes in July...