The State of Jen

I write blog posts in the shower.  I write blog posts when I blow dry my hair.  I write blog posts on the train going to/from work.  I write blog posts as I fall asleep at night.  Such an amazing, dedicated blogger...one would think.  Except there is one teensy-weensy problem.  I have yet to figure out how to actually find the time to turn all these unbelievably witty and thought-provoking daydream posts into, you know, actual ones. 

While on the subject of finding the time...I had a meltdown on the way home from work today.  Lately, I feel like I suck at my job, suck at wifedom, suck at home, suck at taking care of myself and just in general suck at life.  I'm telling you, admittedly, I'm still not sure I fully recovered from the nanny leaving.  My supportive and amazing husband just held my hand and listened to me rant and rave (and sob, I might add) as I shared with him my feelings about just overall sucking at finding balance these days.  Then, ever so matter of factly he said he feels the same way and that he guesses the only way to truly find more time in the day is to just sleep less.  Awesome.

Anyway...

It has been a very busy past few weeks.  There has been so much I've been wanting to post, but I couldn't open my eyes -- literally -- for an entire week!  Oh, where to start...

1.  This is how I spent all of last week:

Hubs and I went out on Saturday night for a friend's 40th birthday.  We went to one of my favorite places -- a dueling piano bar that plays music that makes you want to stand up and dance.  And, so I did.  And, so did my friend.  We got so into our moves that her elbow accidentally found my eye.  It hurt a little at the time and kept watering, but didn't really seem like that big of a deal...until the next morning at 4 a.m. (probably when the alcohol wore off!)  I couldn't open my right eye without excruciating pain and just the strain of trying to see out of my left was too much to bear.  So, after a trip to urgent care (in which the hubs walked the kids in the double stroller and me down the street with my eyes closed) and a Opthamologist (in which I had to be wheel chaired out, due to my lack of food and abundance of pain pills), it was deemed that I had a very major and very large cornial abrasion.  I literally spent 3 days straight in bed - unable to watch TV, read, be on the computer or do just about anything else.  Thank the lord, I have unbelievable friends and family that dropped everything to help!  And, my days were brightened by flowers from friends and a hilarious card that read, "Next time you get into a cat fight at a bar, be courteous enough to take video."  Hee hee.

2. Sadly, I had to call off a volunteer doula shift last week.  I haven't been to a birth since January and I really, really want to!  Keeping my fingers crossed for May!

3.  Our house is going on the market at the end of next week.  Gulp.  Apprehension is really setting in.  I'm so ready for suburban life, but also so not.  The thought of keeping the house psychotically clean makes me physically ill.  Oh, and, we still haven't solved that little problem of where to move next.  Aside from the annoyingness of it all, I truly know its time and am excited for what lies ahead.

4.  And, I saved the very, very best for last.  The newest member of our family was born on April 7.  Hubs middle brother and his wife (who just happens to be my HS friend) welcomed their third baby into the world, a truly precious and adorable little girl.  I now have two nieces and two nephews...who is luckier than me?  I couldn't get enough of snuggling that little baby.  Is there anything more amazing and perfect that newborn babies?!?  Man, do I just adore being an Aunt.  I really, really do.  This little girl just captured my heart at first glance.  I can't wait to spoil her rotten and tell her as much as I can how much I just adore and love her (and her big sister and brother too!)

My SIL rocked, really!  The baby had been breech starting at about 35 weeks and she painstakingly committed herself to all the chiropractic-acupuncture-therapy appointments she could to get that baby girl to turn without medical intervention!  She eventually went in for the version procedure to turn the baby, got to triage and ended up going into labor naturally and when they examined her, the baby had turned head down.  I guess its true that third children are so easy going and accommodating! :)

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for continuing to read and support me, even thought my posts are never as frequent or amazing as they are in my head!